Old Bones

2011 06 20

Von Laserstein, gross minions

June 20

We have rescued the damsels in distress. We try to decide what to do with Damspot the vampire. “We could bring him with us.” “Well he eats people.” “Oh, yeah we should probably just murder this guy.” “Well we could wait ’til he gets hungry, THEN kill him.” We decide to use him as a meat shield then bring him to the Raven Queen to be judged.

We go back to town. Damspot leads us through the swamp. We return the damsels. Frizzle is in disguise so the stable guy doesn’t molest her. We go to a hotel which has a creaky wooden sign with something ominous written on it, and eat hearty stew. A bar brawl will probably happen later.

Extended rest

Jovalene has Metallica Wolf and Man type dreams. Out in the forests I run and kill.

We leave town and head out in the direction the vampires were following before, ie NE. After three hours the road turns to swamp again. After we reach the foothills, Jovalene, Dashwood, and Skull hear Metallica-esque guitar music. Skull freaks the fuck out and insists we leave. She tells a story about an immortal guy with turtle minions. “Wait, you mean Von Laserstein?” Vad flips out a little. “REVENGE.”

Frizzle tries to learn to play the song we’re hearing on a penny whistle Damspot happens to have. Dashwood tries to get a mental lock on a nearby group of people and sees people eating each other. Like people eating other people while those people are eating them.

Vad shouts at the sky trying to get Von Laserstein to appear. Frizzle says wistfully “If only Bruce were here…” Skull says “I will punch you directly in the vagina.” We keep walking and the music gets louder. We approach the sound of moaning gets louder. We see a whole bunch of people eating each other and regenerating. There’s a dude floating and playing the guitar, and encouraging the eating and regenerating.

Frizzle shoots Von Laserstein and all the minions get mad. They are unphased by being hit with cold. Von Laserstein stuns and immobilizes everyone. Frizzle pushes minions away. Jovalene teleports Von Laserstein away from his minions. Vad gets grabbed. Dashwood switches places with him by teleporting and it’s awesome. Frizzle almost dies but Jovalene teleports the attacker and makes him attack someone else. Frizzle makes a storm wall that kills lots of minions and crits against Von Laserstein and does 75 damage. Von Laserstein turns Vad and Dashwood into a fine mist. They try to high five and go through each other. Frizzle picks off minions like a mofo. She then tries to die but Jovalene gives her a shot of adrenaline so she doesn’t fall unconscious. Jovalene teleports Von Laserstein far away so he can’t heal his minions.

Von Laserstein grabs Vad, teleports up, flies higher, reveals Vad’s hand from under his shirt, licks it, says to the group “We’ll see each other soon” and flies off. We hear a crack and Vad drops his sword. Von Laserstein carries Vad away.

4900 exp each



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